Cheating spouse forgive


You won't make much headway without this one.

If your partner hasn't offered a profoundly genuine apology, you still need one. If she's blaming you or the marriage for the affair, she isn't taking responsibility and you're not feeling her remorse. Your cheating partner has now forfeited his rights to his pre-affair privacy. To acknowledge that, he needs to commit to what I call the "kitchen table policy. If he won't tell you his passwords, your suspicions won't abate.

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You need access -- whether you take advantage of it or not. Is she continuing to let you know how sorry she is? Is she acknowledging the suffering she's caused you?

Cheating spouse? Here are instances when you can forgive his infidelity

Does she approach you -- unprompted -- to address the issue? If she doesn't, you'll feel quite isolated in your pain and resentful that the onus is on you to fix this. Affair recovery takes two. You need a supportive, open partner to help you move on. If an affair is a symptom that something's wrong in the marriage, well, what is wrong in the marriage? Even if you're not the one who cheated, ask yourself if the relationship has met your needs and if it's worth saving.

Getting beyond an affair is going to take a lot of time, heartache and patience. Why bother going nuts over his affair if the relationship has run its course?

JOIN THE CONVERSATION

Right now you may feel like you'll be miserable forever. Do yourself a solid and put some time limits in place. If you're pretty sure you want to stay in the relationship, give yourself at least a year and then reassess. Discovering your partner has been unfaithful is nothing short of an emotional trauma. You wouldn't expect to get over the death of someone you love in a couple of months.

Life goes on! Charlie’s Bistro owner moves on, to open new restaurant

Treat your affair recovery with that same respect and sensitivity. A fair assessment of your capacity to forgive. Be honest with yourself. Are you really ever going to be able to move beyond this? Have you historically been able to forgive easily or at all? Are you the type of person who holds grudges?

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If so, you have a big decision to make. You can stay or you can leave, but don't stay in the marriage just to torture your partner about her affair. Read more at Tracey's Mail Online blog here.

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Should you forgive a cheating spouse? Research says it could be a WASTE OF TIME

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